I won’t begin, even though I have, to talk about my lack of commitment to “sprinkling petals” here because that would make this blog, one full of excuses rather than stories.
I’ve lost 2 pounds, about 2 reaching 3 shades darker taking into account the time I’m spending canoodling around on the back of a motorbike, age spots sprouting on one cheek to the next and what not. Note to self: spf 15 ain’t all that great. I reserve well all the scars I had and managed well to acquire none further since the last time I searched for words to pitter patter on this page. I’ve also had that long awaited moment of what Rousseau would call one of those rites of passage: purely in playback: 400 and something names later, D Tran, swift movement, the box of the hat sliding off, heels click one clack two on the stage, hands extending, Pres. Jojo’s mouth muttering “Congratulations”, hands retrieving, hands now grasping onto something new, eyes blurred out by photographers’ flash. And there is was, the ‘passage’ between Jojo and what seemed like finally “the light at the end of the tunnel”…No more slow-mo, it fast-forwarded from there….kabamm, look world! my 4 years of slow mo on this little piece of paper and I can’t even read it, but it’s great, cause here I come …no longer a college student.
For one whole hour, just before the rush of what felt like being ambushed out of the last 4 years of life, just before reality of goodbyes and see-you-soon-but-god-knows-when slapped me across my freshly graduated face, I lived in the fast-forward mode, unaware, still in the lime light in a sense, and completely oblivious to what awaited once the light no longer sparkled, the doors of the institution shut behind me, and my bare self before the coarseness of what is merely the real world.
And it is from that moment when the pain of truth hits, that I began to switch mode. My mind delving backwards, me living in the rewind mode. A purely cinematographic moment, you know in movies when at a wedding, a father has all these flashbacks of when his daughter was 2, 6, and so on or when a couple has troubles in a korean drama, and the guy has these flashbacks of their memories together, the first kiss and such….I had that kind of moment. The place too memorable, and the people too imprinting. It’s hard to say “god knows when”, maybe “i’ll know when” – “see you soon and I’ll know when” …soon. Lol, I promise.
And yes the title does have some significant meaning to it. I started my j-o-b 2 days ago. It’s trotting along well except the hours are kind of odd. We’ll see how it goes and I’ll be sure to update!